My Crush on Sheldon Cooper

I am very sure I’m speaking for almost everybody when I say that I was pretty devastated about the final episode of How I Met Your Mother. I hated it so much I stopped watching TV shows altogether for a while (until Inga convinced me to watch Gilmore Girls, that is). It was only recently that I decided to give in and watch the rest of The Big Bang Theory – which I was certain was going to be a) boring, b) distasteful, and c) make me not want to be in a couple for the rest of my life.

But series 9 has proven to  be very much the opposite!

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The main reason I started watching the show again was because I grew tired of the endless amount of spoilers over on Tumblr. I knew Leonard and Penny were going to get married, and Sheldon and Amy would have coitus, and it just sounded so cringeworthy. Instead, I may have developed a crush on Sheldon Cooper. He has evolved so much since the first series and has actually become likeable since he’s started to admit his feelings. While all the other characters have remained the way they were first introduced (geeky, awkward, self-conscious and a little sexist), Sheldon and Amy are really finding themselves. Amy does not change a thing in her appearance, she doesn’t buy short dresses or high heels, but she realises her own worth and finds that being confident makes her very attractive. And Sheldon, though still geeky and odd, recognises Amy as worth fighting for. More than that, they bring such an important element to the show that was not there before: trust.

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While Leonard and Penny constantly go behind each others’ backs and Bernadette controls Howard’s every move, Sheldon and Amy are very straight forward and honest. In the scene where they actually, finally, have sex, Amy tells Sheldon that she’s nervous and doesn’t know what to expect, to which he replies, «Neither do I. But we can find out together.» The entire scene is so innocent and such a stark contrast to what we usually see with Penny and Leonard (which is known to be fast and, on a large scale, disappointing).

I have loved The Big Bang Theory for years, and I find it very hard to not like any of the characters, however annoying they might be. But rewatching some of the older episodes, I’ve only now realised how much my way of thinking has been influenced by characters like Penny or Bernadette who make it look okay to dress like a slut in order to get free drinks. I love that Amy now finally gets to show how sexy cardigans really are! So if you’re looking for something uplifting – series 9 is excelling on every level!

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Lots of love from the roots of my heart!
xxx

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How To Be A Woman by Caitlin Moran

So, I’ve finally got around to write a little something about Book 4 of Emma Watson’s feminist book club Our Shared Shelf – it’s Caitlin Moran’s How To Be A Woman! 

«Though they  have the vote and the Pill and haven’t been burned as witches since 1727, life isn’t exactly a stroll down the catwalk for modern women. They are beset by uncertainties and questions: Why are they supposed to get Brasilians? Why do bras hurt? Why the incessant talk about babies? And do men secretly hate them?

Caitlin Moran interweaves provocative observations on women’s lives with laugh-out-lout funny scenes from her own, from the riot of adolescence to her development as a writer, wife and mother. With rapier wit, Moran slices right to the truth – whether it’s about the workplace, strip clubs, love, fat, abortion, popular entertainment, or children – to jump-start a new conversation about feminism. With humour, insight, and verve, How To Be A Woman lays bare the reasons why female rights and empowerment are essential issues not only for women today but for society itself.»

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I have already discussed this book with various friends and everytime they asked me what I thought, I came back to same response: «Well… meh!» It’s funny, it’s dirty (like, actually dirty dirty – the kind that makes you want to wash your hands afterwards!), it has a couple of interesting ideas… it’s just not very deep. What really bothered me was the humour. I’m not sure if I’m just not British or funny enough to get it, but it just felt over the top. I understand the attempt to make feminism seem more enjoyable than the bunch of angry, non-shaving man-eaters do, but there is a difference between joking about sexism in the office and joking about abortions – even if you’ve had one yourself. And the notion of what I have to do in order to be a woman I can simply not live up to. According to Caitlin Moran, I have to…

… finger myself ten hours a day

… stand on a chair and shout, «I AM A STRIDENT FEMINIST!»

… taste my own menstrual blood

… refuse to shave anything

… not wear high heels

… when pregnant, refuse to prepare myself for the birth

… not have a fancy, enjoyable fairytale wedding

… have an abortion

… … …

Okay, before any of you start yelling at their screens, I KNOW THIS IS NOT WHAT SHE MEANT! But her opinion on these things is so strong, it scares me a little. And that’s the real shame, because largely I agree with her! To be honest, I think it was about time someone pointed out that masturbation is not something only disgusting males do, and that women do have sexy fantasies. I agree that shaving our legs and everything else has turned into a bit of an unhealthy obsession in our society, and that high heels are just incredibly uncomfortable and useless, as are insanely expensive handbags. And she’s right about weddings, about abortion (god, I’ve been waiting fort hat exact opinion in an author!) – it’s all true! Well, mostly, anyway. So, in that sense, WELL DONE, CAITLIN!

I might have enjoyed this book more, were it more of a secret gem; but it’s so hyped and it’s supposed to be so extraordinary, I found it to be a bit of a let down. Her ideas are not inherently bad or wrong, but nor are they very original. But hey, maybe our society just needs to be reminded, and maybe Caitlin Moran can speak to people Emmeline Pankhurst couldn’t reach, and then the whole point of the book has been achieved! So I shall not condemn it!

To finish this round off, let me leave you with a part that I particularly enjoyed reading:

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Lots of love from the roots of my heart!
xxx

Open Letter to My 15-Year Old Self

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Dear My 15-Year Old Self

I am writing to you tell you just how much I admire you. Going by the pictures, you are really serious about those pink-camouflage pants, and I think that deserves a salute.

I know that you are scared a lot because you feel different and most people don‘t seem to understand. All those nights lying awake and wondering, wondering how they can‘t see that you want to be just like them. Why don‘t they see how hard you are trying? How everytime you fall down you push yourself back up again? – But believe me, being different is not a bad thing. People will always laugh at you, they‘ll laugh at you for any reason. Whether you‘re too ordinary or you‘re too extravagant, they will always find something to mock you about. So be daring, and give them a jolly good reason to laugh. Be different, be ridiculous. Be everything that you are with a power that will knock them down.

So, I noticed you have bit of trouble finding your own style. To be honest, the pink-camouflage pants and the orange T-shirt with the stripes don‘t work very well together (but I‘m not going to mention it). The thing is that people outside of magazines rarely even have this thing called style. It‘s more like a disease, really. You don‘t have to become a demon-slaughtering shadowhunter to wear a leather jacket. You want that jacket, you go for it, girl! You want to wear smudgy black eyeliner and look mysterious? Just do it (although you will probably fail, but I‘m not going to mention it)! Everyday you can change who you are, don‘t you understand? You are not tied to one wardrobe or to one favourite boyband (and since we‘re on the topic, US5 are going to split up pretty darn soon anyway) or one version of yourself. You are never going to stop becoming yourself, because there will always be people leaving an imprint on your soul, places that change the way you look at the world and stories and that transform your thinking entirely. And girl, you are going places!

What is never going to falter is your love for books. Although I‘m glad to say that your taste in storytelling is. No, don‘t cry – Harry Potter and Jane Austen are always king and queen of your universe. But I wish you would stop believing you are Clary Fray. Honestly, that girl has a lot of issues. For a start, you do not need to have your first relationship when you are sixteen. You will, of course, but still; just take a moment here, all right? The guy you are going to meet is a real sweetheart, but he‘s not Jace. He‘s not the love of your life, no matter how hard you want him to be. Clary is a delusional idiot, made up by a desperate middle aged woman who probably has never had sex herself, so why do you think you need to live by the book? Write your own book, be your own superhero. There are more important things in life than having sex before you‘re seventeen and dating people that look like Richie Stringini (although he is pretty hot, I‘ll give you that!).

You are such a cool teenager, do you ever realise that? You read Charles Dickens for fun, your perfect night out is a Harry Potter midnight book launch, and you don‘t drink or do drugs. But I hate to break it to you, but soon that is not going to be you any more, so you might as well stop judging others for getting drunk on the weekends. You are going to love getting drunk! It‘ll take some time to gain control, but if you keep the people you love close to you, nothing bad will ever happen to you.

Growing up doesn‘t sound so bad now, does it? Responsibility is not such a sucky thing once you get the hang of it, you know? Sure, you have to make your own doctor‘s appointments and crying in public is frowned upon. But you still get to go to Disneyland and obsess over dinosaurs. Also, being grown-up means that you can spend all your money on chocolate AND THEN EAT IT ALL ON YOUR OWN! Being an adult, you don‘t stop loving certain things, you can just love them more openly, because you will stop caring what others think. And, OMG, guess what? Being a nerd is going to be totally cool! In fact, all those assholes that think calling you a geek is an insult, yeah, they are going to buy friggin‘ fake glasses to look smarter. And you, my sweet angel face, you are going to buy glasses to see better. Because you are already smart. Never think that being intelligent is a bad thing. Only stpuid people will let you believe that. Nope! Embrace your inner nerd with all your heart! 

You know what I love most about you, My 15-Year Old Self? You are on the verge of taking a massive leap into the unknown, and you are putting all of your heart and soul into it. I wish you would never stop doing that.
There are many moments of doubt still to come. You will find yourself crying on a bathroom floor more than once, and sometimes there will not be enough chocolate flavoured ice cream in the world to make you feel all right again. But I will tell you this: You are going to be happy, and you are going to be fine. You will always be surrounded by people who love you, and you will make many more people fall in love with you.

And finally: enjoy the Star Wars prequels while it lasts, because soon you will start to see Anakin for the whiny bastard he truly is and fall in love with Han. Also, don‘t cry because Tokio Hotel are not an item any more, you just haven‘t met One Direction yet. Also, the Sorting Hat puts you into Slytherin. Don‘t let it ruin your day, Draco is going to turn out so much hotter than Harry!

Unfortunately, 15-year old me, we have still not published our bestselling novel or saved the world from evil or married a prince. But we are in a good place. The kind of good place where on some days we go swimming in the Carribean, while on others the best thing that happens is somebody telling us that our dress is pretty. We are pretty amazing, you and I.

With love,
23-Year Old Me

Sex Sex Sex!

I just wrote about this on my German blog this week, and it was so popular I thought I might as well discuss it on here: SEX!

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© by Jonathan Liechti

A few years ago I had this wonderful friend who‘d had a baby at the sweet age of sixteen. Apparently it had happened because her ex-boyfriend really wanted to sleep with her until finally she gave in, even though she did not feel comfortable about it. I remember thinking to myself, how hard can it be to just say no?! But six years have passed since then and I‘ve come to realise that saying no is no easy option when it comes to people you care about. Now, I‘m not pregnant and no one ever pressured me into having sex with them, but we‘ve all at some point have felt this ever nagging feeling of not wanting to let somebody down.
That‘s crap!
The only person you can ever let down is yourself. Imagine somebody offers you a chocolate bar you don‘t like – will you eat it? No, probably not. Is anyone going to judge you? No – and why would they?!

To be fair, things are very different when it comes to sex. And one of the most urgent questions I‘ve been asked is, „Are you still a virgin?“ It‘s very tricky, because if you‘re under fifteen you should probably best answer with no, but if you‘re over sixteen you should definitely say yes! And that‘s just crappy, too. Being a virgin has nothing to with being ugly, boring or utterly unattractive. And at the same time, losing your virginity when you‘re thirteen doesn‘t mean you‘re a slut. I know people who have been in open sexual relationships, I know people who have one-night-stands all the time, and I know people who are in their late teens and who have never even kissed anyone, because they haven‘t met the right person yet. My point is, your virginity does not define you. Sex is like that chocolate bar – if you think you‘ll enjoy it, eat it. If it gives you the creeps, don‘t! And yeah, people will talk. But they do little else. And you know, self respect doesn‘t come from sleeping around, it comes from loving yourself. You‘re not going to love yourself more if you do things you don‘t feel comfortable about to start with. The only person that gets to be disappointed is you, and I think that‘s the one person you don‘t want to disappoint.

Juicy Paris
Juicy Paris